A Humorous Take on Organic Foods
By: Christine Hersom
(3 min. read)
Do you buy only organic foods while grocery shopping? I do not. I am unwilling to spend the money. I do try to buy fresh food and buy my meat locally. This is not to belittle those who buy organic. It is just to put a hilarious spin on it.
I sometimes feel like organic food is just a fancy way to separate me from hard-earned cash. Let’s go on a journey through the wacky world of organic food – where the veggies are greener, the fruits are juicier, and the prices are higher than Snoop Dogg at a gourmet burger joint.
I will start with the noble carrot. They are the unsung hero of the vegetable world. Organic carrots are like the Kardashians of the produce aisle – they look flawless, cost a small fortune, and they have a cult following that swears they can cure everything from a bad hair day to a broken heart. I am all about a versatile piece of produce. But have you noticed how these carrots always seem to come in odd shapes and sizes? It’s like they were grown by a vegetable Picasso who took one look at a normal carrot and said, “Nah, let’s make this one look like a yoga pose gone wrong.”
Don’t even get me started on organic bananas. These guys are the divas of the fruit bowl—they bruise if you look at them wrong, ripen faster than a Hollywood marriage, and God forbid you accidentally buy a bunch that’s still green because you’ll be waiting for them to turn yellow longer than you waited for your crush to text you back in high school.
The crown jewel of the organic world is the avocado. Avocado toast (which I love) has become the symbol of excess, with people everywhere shelling out large portions of their paychecks for a slice of bread with smashed green goodness. An organic avocado is very expensive. It’s like the avocado saw the housing market and said, “Hold my pit. I can be just as overpriced and unattainable.” At restaurants, I find myself splurging on avocado toast … it’s delicious!
When I was a child my mother and her friends had tea parties that they called quilting bees. At that time, the “exotic” item was the Jordan Almonds. If you put those on your table, you were doing great. Today, it seems the organic produce replaces Jordan’s Almonds.
I have to say that the thing that I found most comical at the grocery store was the advertisement for meat. It had all been labeled as certified for care by an animal welfare officer. Here I was, looking at a hunk of beef that somebody had labeled as well-treated. Really…they are dead. I am looking at their muscles pre-packaged for dinner. I understand what they meant by the statement, but is it really necessary to point out that they died “Nicely”… they are still dead. To make it even more interesting, the meat costs more per pound than the current price of gold on the market.
Despite the quirks and absurdities of the organic food market, there is something undeniably charming about it all. Maybe it’s the idea of supporting small farmers and sustainable agriculture, or maybe it’s just the allure of our picture-worthy smoothies. Whatever the reason, one thing is for sure—organic food has a way of making us feel like we’re one kale salad away from achieving inner peace and six-pack abs.
So, the next time you find yourself debating between conventional and organic produce at the store, remember this blog and have a good chuckle. Embrace the madness, enjoy the ride, and most importantly, don’t forget to save your receipts because those organic receipts are no joke – they’re practically a down payment on a Tesla.
In conclusion, organic food may be expensive, high-maintenance, and occasionally ridiculous, but hey, at least it gives us something to laugh about while we sip our $10 cold-pressed green juice. And who knows, maybe one day we’ll look back on this era of organic obsession and chuckle at how we once paid extra for carrots that looked like modern art. Until then, keep calm and try to take yourself a little less seriously. Whether you’re a die-hard organic enthusiast or a skeptic who thinks a carrot is just a carrot, there’s room for all of us at the table. So, let’s embrace the madness, savor the flavors, and never forget to laugh at yourself.
Christine Marshall Hersom
All Things Wellness, LLC
christinehersom@yahoo.com
The information provided is the author’s opinion and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnoses, or treatment. The author and the business, All Things Wellness, LLC, and its owner Peggy Willms are not liable for risks or issues associated with using or acting upon the information on this website. We assume no responsibility for tangible and intangible damages such as physical harm caused by using a product, loss of profits or loss of data, and defamatory comments.
