Running Numbers

By: Lara Scriba


(3 min read)

This week was fueled by a sense of urgency to take action. “Go big or go home” was the mantra that played in my head over and over. It was time to take some concrete actions toward some big goals I had set for myself.

I absolutely love learning and can easily get stuck in research mode, chronic course taking, feeling like I just need to learn, do one more thing, and take one more course before I take the big leap. I take edutainment to a whole other level. 

But this year has been one of taking intense leaps of faith and muddling my way forward, even though I am not sure where it will lead. What I do know is that if I keep taking small incremental steps toward the essence of my dreams, it will take me somewhere magnificent. 

I just have to trust myself and take action in the meantime.  Over and over again. 

If the past few years have taught me nothing else, it’s that though we can have an overarching plan for the years ahead, there is no guarantee. It’s the focus on the moments, days, and weeks ahead that lead to a meaningful existence.

Knowing this in my heart to be true, of course, but my mind tends to meddle and loves to doubt, belittle and catastrophize.

I often get caught in the need for outside validation that my actions are worth pursuing or that I am skilled enough or capable of following through and making it happen.   

I know so many of us struggle with the same. The dreaded “imposter syndrome.” I found my brain bouncing back and forth between the “who am I” to “fake it till you make it” mentality. 

The heaviness and stagnancy that imposter syndrome coats every part of your being is suffocating, choking the life out of any creativity that exists.  But the “fake it till you make it” energy feels untethered and unstable.

I knew there had to be a middle ground out there somewhere but didn’t realize I would have a chance to experience it in just a few hours.

Still wrestling with my mindset but full of determination and a pocket full of Post-it notes for brainstorming, I headed to a friends for a co-working session. We both had big goals we wanted to tackle, and she had a quiet space and coffee waiting. Perfection!

Fueled by caffeine and enthusiasm, little tasks were being checked off left and right. The table checkered with yellow, blue, and green Post-its as the steps to our dreams became a visual reality. Clarity was coming in hot, and so was the elation we felt as we crumpled up, crossed off, or ticked a box for every task completed.

But then it got really quiet. We both had reached a point where we were working on our bios and resumes, and you could hear a pin drop. Imposter syndrome was trying to edge its way in.

Time for a fresh cup of coffee and a fresh outlook.

We took a break and switched gears. It was time to play a bit. Over the weekend, I had “run her numbers.” No, not her finances, but her birthdate, to give me what we call a “ruling number” in numerology. 

I pulled her numerology report out of my bag, and we dove right in. A lightness once again filled the room as we explored her unique gifts, traits, talents, strengths and challenges.

 It was only a few moments before I heard the resounding “YES, that’s it!”. My absolute favorite is the moment when someone feels truly seen. All of the dreams, aspirations, insights, fears, frustrations, and mind blocks come tumbling out. 

The tension of expectations fell away as she was able to embrace the gifts she has to offer the world. Recognizing challenges she may be facing but feeling a sense of ease and knowing there are simple solutions to support oneself once there is awareness of where the true struggles lie. 

An ability to apply assets practically in all areas of life when the essence of her intentions and unique lens were clearly articulated. A sense of potential and possibility opened.

As we regrouped after our quick session, I couldn’t help but marvel at the beauty of energy work, as it is always as grounding for me as it is for them. We were entering our work now from a completely different lens.

We sat down once again, but this time we had recentered and had moved out of our heads and into our hearts. Finally able to tackle the hardest task of all, unapologetically and unabashedly sharing our strengths, vision of possibility, and zone of genius.

A beautiful reminder that we are more than enough. It’s just a matter of tapping into our why, owning the strengths we bring to the table, and taking steps fueled by a sense of conviction, confidence, and certainty that we will turn our dreams into reality.   

Lara Scriba
                                                                     All Things Wellness, LLC
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